if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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