She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
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