What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Randomize