Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
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