S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Is it penis luge time yet?
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Randomize
