Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Randomize
