One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Less talking, more tequila
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Randomize