im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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