If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
