spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize