what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
My liver just had a heart attack.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
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