dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize
