I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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