I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Randomize
