do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
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