talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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