i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
NoShamevember. You game?
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
