Can i not drive my cunt home
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
he thought i was a dude.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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