Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize