everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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