the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Randomize
