some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
