I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize
