Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
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I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
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