sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
