i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
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