Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
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what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
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Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
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