I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
These 25 People Believed Fake Facts For Way Too Long
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
The uberlube is also flammable
We had sex on a dog bed..
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.