Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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