i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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