I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
