my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Randomize
