Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Randomize