No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
ugly people sure do ruin things
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
