So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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