guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Randomize