i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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