I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
