I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
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