remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
that is very illegal...i love you.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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