And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary