I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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