I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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