I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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