I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
