You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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