Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
