dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
