question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
