We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
